Four Eyes: Elitism: Open Season

So, as I sit next to Corwin in the computer lab, smelling like something similar to a wet dog, it occurs to be that I have not updated in ... a while. And far be it from me to ignore the creative and dramatic outcries of my devoted fans, purely to appease my own desire to veg in front of my Mac playing Super Mario World.

By the way, in keeping with Super Mario, this is a great song.

This is turning out to be (as Corwin would say) the Spring Break... OF DOOM!!!! Promptly on Monday night, my Lymph glands decided to inflate like balloons and my sinuses tried to suffocate me while I slept. I haven't even been able to wear my contacts without my eyeballs trying to secede from the union. I'm not trying to point fingers or anything, but given the flu-like symptoms demonstrated by my nephews, and the general propensity of children not to wash their hands, you can tell where my suspicions lay. As breaks go, this one is somewhat non-existent. I've got a paper due the first day after break, I haven't had time to do my reading for classes yet, and I've got 6 other papers due within the 6 weeks left of school. Yippee.

On that note, I've also figured out the essence that is Ave: Academic Elitism combined with Kindergarten Snack Time. The bizarre paradigm created by Father Roy and Suzanne Abdala, which in other circles might cancel each other out, join forces to mutate into a strange and mystical monster. Probably something like a minotaur. Or a goatface.

Later today (actually, in like a ten minutes) the fiance and I will be heading over to my parent's to do our taxes. Tax Season, for those of you not yet familiar with it, is that wonderful time of year in early Spring when our accountants and IRS agents hunt down the working masses and use them as target practice. Weeee!

Eucharistic?: Brain Aneurisms: Kinsey V. Freud

So, having spent an unusually large portion of the weekend with my family (a raucous birthday party and Sunday mass- which is alot for me) I came away with the feeling that yes, I do in fact have the blessing of a non-dysfunctional family. Not that we don't have our quirks, to which Justin has often been exposed. But it's a healthy weirdness. We spent the majority of the party playing card games and reminiscing about the good ol' days- like when Phil stole the car (repeatedly), Katie ruling the house with an Iron Fist, and me stealing Jenny's cigarettes when I decided I didn't approve of smoking.

And what's more, our weirdness is being passed on to the future generations- as demonstrated perfectly by my nephews. TJ is now learning to read and write; he can put letters together to form words. The first word he came up with? Rum. Yes, Rum. And he proceeded to pretend he was drinking Rum at the party, which culminated in him staggering around and acting drunk. I'm still not quite sure where he learned this from (oh, the corruption of today's youth- it comes from too many pirate movies, i'm sure) but nevertheless, we had to explain to him that drinking too much is not something to joke about.
Ian (who is only 3) is still at a more innocent stage, wherein he says things that seem bizarre but must make sense in his still developing mind- things like, during the Consecration in Mass, "I'm too young to kneel!" which cause us too look at each other over his head, and become bemused at what should be expected from young children during the Mass.

Anyway, in addition to the fun and games of this weekend, I've been having a jolly good (read: boring) time doing my extensive reading for my theology classes. We've got midterms coming up. Not that this causes our professors to cut down on our workload. We've still got as many assignments as ever, but we're expected to take even more time to study during the next two weeks. I'm convinced that this could not be accomplished unless we implement my patented plan for the 30-Hour-Day. But at least I can rest secure in the knowledge that I'm not being indoctrinated with false principles, which is more than I could say if I were doing the same workload at just about any other college. Woo for Orthodoxy! And also, where could I get fabulous quotes from my professors to keep me entertained during the 3-Hour class time?

And finally a question: In a death match between Sigmund Freud and Alfred Kinsey, who would win? And more importantly, if either of them were to die, would we care?

Copyright Infringement: Quadcumque: Engrish?

So... I guess... blogger hates me now. After working swiftly and adeptly on a new update, my blog spontaneously decided to screw with my html, thereby deleting sporadic phrases within my post. Pretty much the only thing that worked as it should was my title, the pattern of which was in fact stolen from Corwin. Whatev.

So, to make up for my lack of postage (39 cents my butt!) here's a few Engrish links that might have made it into my blog if I'd been able to post it. But don't worry, the real update is coming as soon as my motivation increases in reverse proportion to my despair at the lack of fruition of my effort. :-)

http://www.engrish.com/detail.php?imagename=toiletwash.jpg&category=Signs/Posters&date=2003-03-03


http://www.engrish.com/detail.php?imagename=incas.jpg&category=Signs/Posters&date=2003-03-10

http://www.engrish.com/detail.php?imagename=pachinko.jpg&category=Signs/Posters&date=2003-03-11


http://www.engrish.com/detail.php?imagename=lifewithcreap.jpg&category=Signs/Posters&date=2003-05-13


http://www.engrish.com/detail.php?imagename=sticktocoffee.jpg&category=Signs/Posters&date=2003-06-27

http://www.engrish.com/detail.php?imagename=freak.jpg&category=Signs/Posters&date=2003-09-01

The Illustrious Fightgar: Past, Present, and Future

Once upon a time, there was a family VonBuelow.

The VonBuelows, in traditional Catholic family fashion, decided to have enough children to take over and eventually populate a small country. And in order to make it seem as though they already had enough men to populate the country, the parents gave each of their sons seven names.

The one which concerns us today is **deep breath** Roland Theodor Dominic Niklot Bernhard Edward Pepin VonBuelow, younger brother to the lovable Jaspar Friedrich Joseph Peter Howard Werner Hartwig and Carl Andreas Christian Ernst Bodo Alexander Johann (otherwise known as Twinz), and older brother to such enjoyable characters as Josef Albert Augustin Wolfram Georg Otto Leopold, Stefan Alan Waldemar Anton French Wilhelm Raphael, Johannes Franz Paul Hubertus Eric Justin Michael, and Francesco Eric Christopher Marcus Gottfried Gabriel James.

Now aren't you jealous?

Anyway, Pepin, in his stellarly amazing ways, has gone on to excel in the military, dancing, breaking people's limbs off, playing computer games, harassing younger siblings, eating dinner, and messing around with hazardous members of the animal kingdom.

What more is there to live for? Like, other than dinner at the Von Buelow house?

(::)

-Melissa "Not Quite An Enfield" VandeVoorde

That Old Post That Noone Looks At Anymore

So- I couldn't find the original picture from that March For Life link a couple posts ago, but these kids are almost as cute as the first one, albeit without the meaningful quote from Mother Teresa underneath it. Ahh well, can't win 'em all I suppose.

Coming Soon: Seven Names For Seven Brothers. Or something like it.

So.. I Was About to Blog, When...

I realized that I should be heading over to the cafeteria for dinner.

Hopefully update later tonight, when I'll be working on my papers due next week. Yippee!

By the way, come to the Fedoryka's tonight to read Deus Caritas Est!

Poo.

It appears that some of my links aren't working the way I planned- I'll fix it when I get a chance, just pretend like you never saw it.

In the meantime, enjoy this nifty little article. If you've never read The DaVinci Code, don't bother buying it, I don't want Dan Brown to get more royalties. Just borrow it from me or the library or something so you can be informed about the idiocy that gets published around here.

"Sneer Quotes"

So in this lovely little college where I'm taking nothing but theology classes- I've learned probably... a few things... in class over the last week or so. Like, for instance, how Tertullian easily slipped into a heretical sect in his later career, and eventually got SO good at it, that he split off into his very own sect of Tertullianism.

Would that I could have such lofty goals.

But the recurring theme in my classes (probably a result of having Dr. VanSlyke for 3 of my classes) is the proper care and feeding of Sneer Quotes. No seriously. He talked about it in all three classes. Whatev.

Anyway, most exciting thing in the last week? March For Life. We got free T-shirts. And lobbied at our senators. Oh, and there's that whole standing up for the dignity of human life thing. : )

Gotta get crack-a-lackin on my homework (writing assignment on the Apostolic Tradition due tomorrow morning. woo!) so I'm off for now.

Thanks to Justin for the use of his laptop in this endeavor.

My Eyeballs Hurt

Well, they do.
I am having a bad day. Don't ask me why, because I don't know- I am just currently experiencing one of those inexplicably bad moods. And of course, I consequently act like a jerk and am unrepentant for it. Don't worry- I realize I'm acting like a total brat, and that I shouldn't be. I'm trying to cut it out.

So when all else fails to cheer me up, I do it myself. And you know what cheers me up the most? Discount hormone prescriptions available online!!!

Well, these are pretty good too.

But I like them alot too. Mostly the guy in the middle there.

K, time for bed- hope you were as amused as I was, and I promise the next post will be happier!

Back In the Saddle Again

more updates as the semester progresses- or at least gets funnier (-looking!).

Reasons for Not Updating During Christmas Break

1. Really slow dial-up. Really.
2. Sister visiting from Chicago for the holidays.
3. Two families to visit instead of one.
4. Family harassing about not spending enough time with said family.
5. Shopping for 10+ people to be done in the space of 3 days.
6. Seriously, this connection is way too slow.
7. Computer not available due to family members previous reservation/occupation of computer room.
8. Did I mention the slow internet here?
9. Catching up with friends over break, having barely spoken during the semester.
10. Newfound addiction to things other than being online.
11. Now dividing time online between several different email accounts and blogs. Damn myspace.
12. Distracted by shiny stuff.
13. Sole holiday decorator in household.
14. Fingers injured in tragic Christmas tree accident- attempts to type with teeth unsuccessful.
15. Not enough time to check other blogs, thus resulting in lower motivation and creativity in mine.

Hope Christmas is treating you all well, and hopefully I'll be up and running online sometime soon!
-Adolf

Come the Revolution...

We will have no tyrannical authorities (?) to assign us ridiculous reading and writing topics! We will have freedom and equality! And we will have these as pets!

Only a couple more hours until Christmas break!!!

Overstimulation

yep.

Does anybody want to write a paper for me?

It's almost to the point where things like this make sense to me.

The Dreaded MAC/Grateful Dead Complex

Well, Metaphysics turned out alright I guess. Still have 4 more papers and 5 more finals to study for, Advent Angels and a few more 3-hour-long choir practices before I'm done for the semester.
Funny, the workload seems to continue even after classes are finished. How riddikulus.

As a side note, the roommate has finally snapped, Cor is showing signs of meth abuse, Angie is probably considering finding a hired assassin, and Creative Juices are in high demand and low supply all across the board.

Who's ready for Christmas break ?

Feddie-physics

Well, it's paper-writing time again. No sleep for this little lamb, got a 10-pager due in about 8 1/2 hours, and am desperately hoping for a case of logorrhea. Being qua being, here I come!

More as the insanity develops!

Too Close For Comfort...

It came to my attention today that as a human race, we have some dangerously similar sounding phrases with disturbingly different meanings. A couple of my favorites?

Extramental Existence / Excremental Existence

Erschiessungstode / Erscheissungstode

Have you ever noticed (much in the way that Eskimos have extensive vocabulary for snow) we have way too many words for poop? Feces.. fecal matter.. poo.. sh*t.. and many more.

So my point is, this is the latest and greatest Dr. Fedoryka Quote of the Day:
"My love is like a brown, brown cow pie."

If Hannibal Lector Were A Book, Which Would He Be?

How To Win Friends and Influence People.

Half a Post

I want one.

Can't Improve On Something Perfect...

Reading through this one, I realized that it can't possibly match up to the one before. But then again, that's what happens when you try to be funny while you're coming down off a caffeine high at 7 am. Many improvements to follow, don't worry-

Captain's Log, Stardate: 1 Dec. 2005

Would have updated on 30 Nov., but as the official changeover occurs promptly at 6 a.m., this blog missed its deadline.

Stress levels continue, although no exponential increase has been observed. Caffeine withdrawal symptoms, while brief, have been temporarily alleviated by the presence of non-intravenous energy inducements.

A. Grutter has once again been observed maintaining abnormal sleep patterns, although one suspects given her apparent lack of deprivation signs, she has been compensating for nocturnal activity through diurnal somnolence.

Beginning to fear for my own ability to cope with conditions. Must be monitored closely for safety and sanity. Must maintain insomnia until mission is completed....